What Makes a Marriage

Last night my husband and I were sitting next to each other on the couch watching what most would consider to be pretty terrible SciFi. The girls had gone to bed and we were just soaking in the peace and quiet and "superheroes." Somehow or another we got to talking about love. I asked my husband if he believed in the soul-mate hypothesis - there being ONE perfect person out there for everyone. I am personally a believer that he is my perfect match. He replied, "No," with a chuckle. He was probably laughing at the look on my face because it was a mix of semi-shock and sadness. How sad that he does not think I am his perfect person. He quickly noted my reaction and went onto explain..."None of us is perfect. And none of us is perfect for another." I went onto caveat that I thought he was who God had planned me for and vice-versa. He conceded to this argument.

Today, we celebrate our eighth year of marriage...and all the good and bad that have come with it. And it does remind me as I reflect upon our life together that we are indeed NOT at all perfect for one another. He is absolutely not what I had in mind for my husband when I met him...and I have it on good authority that as he got to know me and we began dating and even during our engagement, he thought I was absolutely nuts. I believe he phrased it, "I either had to marry you or go into hiding." And that's about how it was.

As we have grown up together these past several years though, I have realized over and over again that my hubs is not what I wanted, he's not even what I would consider as "perfect," but he was and is and will continue to be everything that God needs him to be in my life - what I need him to be in my life. I am the same for him.

The entire concept of covenant marriage and the sacredness of it...the very sacrament would be lost if we had married into perfection. But we willingly stepped into imperfection and said, "I will love this and protect this and cherish this and honor this with my whole heart." And that's what we have tried to do. That's what Christ did. And that is why marriage is such a wonderful depiction of His love for us...the Church.

So, if you are celebrating or mourning or struggling or fighting through...take heart and know that you are living out the love of Christ.

Thank you, sweet husband. You have and always will be such a wonderful depiction of Christ's love for me.