Preparing Myself

This has certainly been a season of preparation. Hubs and I prepared for the move, we prepared ourselves to be in a new place, Hubs prepared for the BAR and is currently preparing himself for the results, we spent (and are spending) lots of time preparing pieces of paper that tell others how prepared we are to take on paying jobs, and now, I prepare for what my be a very difficult ear of teaching.

I don't say this to shed a dark light on my upcoming professional year, but to thank God that always before a trying and difficult season, He gives us a season of preparation - whether we are aware of it or not. I knew that my summer would be extra long this year...and didn't know that I was going to need all those weeks in order to get my head together - not to mention a jazillion lesson plans and course syllabi and articulated curriculae. More so, emotionally, I didn't think I needed this time to just sit and be, to go on adventures with my hubby, and to reflect on what was.

I miss home, my town, my students, my school, church, friends, family. I miss them more each day. I miss knowing fully and being fully known - there is nothing greater as that mimics how God knows each of us - fully. However, it's harmful (not to mention painful) to live looking backwards, right? It didn't lead to a favorable end for Lot's wife and it will do none of us favors now.

If you find yourself looking back to a time before the move, before the accident, before that fateful conversation, before the baby just know that God has you in today. He holds you in today. He will comfort you today - but He wants you to be where you are looking towards Him.